Don Coscarelli’s ‘John Dies At The End’ (2012): Two Slackers, An Interdimensional Street Drug, And Wig Monsters – Retro Review

Ten years ago on January 23, 2012, John Dies at the End lured me in with an absolutely irresistible title. It seemed fitting that Don Coscarelli should direct it. It isn’t just a horror film… maybe more of a horror comedy, or a horror sci-fi, but not horror alone. Coscarelli is most famously known at the creative force behind the Phantasm series. I’m a huge fan. Phantasm was one of those films I saw at a single digit age that changed me. How did killer silver spheres and dwarves tie in with a funeral home? I would’ve never thought of it, but Coscarelli did.

His newer films were based on the literary work of other people. Even though he didn’t write the source material, I’m still delighted that when I try to describe Bubba Ho-Tep to anybody. They’re like, “What? Elvis is in a nursing home with JFK whose black now, and a mummy in a cowboy hat is trying to suck their souls? That sounds crazy!” He has a talent in seeing how an unlikely combination of situations and characters can be pure gold. John Dies at the End may be the culmination of that. Even if I did give tons of spoilers away, you would still have to see it for yourself.

John Dies at the End began in 2001, free on that thing that eventually caught on called the internet. It was written by a mysterious guy named David Wong, who was really Cracked.com writer Jason Pargin. That’s where the offbeat humor comes in. In true Napster era fashion, it was too good to be given away. It was given a proper book release and spawned two sequel books, This Book is Full of Spiders in 2012, and What the Hell Did I Just Read in 2017. Another forthcoming book this year, If This Book Exists, You’re in the Wrong Universe, is scheduled to be released this year. So there’s a lot more material to be mined for additional films.

Coscarelli saw potential in the first story and adapted it into a screenplay. I love this film, but I still have trouble telling someone what it’s about. Here it goes anyway as spoiler free as I can make it.

The central character is David Wong (Chase Williamson: All The Creatures Were Stirring 2018 – our review). He meets up with a reporter named Arnie to recount a sordid and unbelievable ordeal that he and his friend, John (Rob Mayes: Deep Blue Sea 2 2018), survived (sort of). It all begins at a party where Dave and John meet a drug dealer who seems to know things about Dave that only someone who was clairvoyant could know. After separating from John, Dave gets a phone call from him to come over as soon as possible. Once at John’s apartment, Dave finds a syringe filled with a black almost bile-like liquid, but no John. The street name for what’s in the needle is Soy Sauce, and it’s more than just recreational. It seems to transcend death, space, and time. Dave then embarks on a trippy odyssey with John as his absent/present guide. By the time Dr. Albert Marconi (Clancy Brown: The Mortuary Collection 2019 –  our review) shows up, you can’t help but wonder what the hell you are watching.

John Dies at the End, David Wong, Chase Williamson, soy sauce
Dave finds the Soy Sauce

There are few films that I recommend that anyone who is remotely open minded should see. John Dies At The End is one of them. Even if they end up hating it, they’re better off seeing something that someone took a chance on making and releasing, because it’s so wonderfully weird. I thought Don Coscarelli really stretched his reach with Bubba Ho-Tep, but John Dies at the End doesn’t exist in anyone’s comfort zone. It has trademark elements of guys like Cronenberg, the really crazy stuff that is horrifying, weird and unforgettable. John Dies at the End is nowhere near as dark, though. It goes down easier like a stoner flick, but maybe a thinking person’s stoner flick. Then again, stoners do all the deep thinking, anyway.

John Dies at the End (John Dies at the End, #1) by David Wong
The Meat Monster from John Dies At The End

Written by David Wong and Screenplay by Don Coscarelli.

Cast: Chase Williamson (Dave), Rob Mayes (John), Paul Giamatti (Arnie), Clancy Brown (Dr. Albert Marconi), Doug Jones (Roger North), Glynn Turman (Detective), Daniel Roebuck (Largeman), Fabianne Therese (Amy), Jonny Weston (Justin White), Tai Bennett (Robert Marley).

About Kevin Scott

Parents who were not film savvy and completely unprepared for choosing child appropriate viewing material were the catalyst that fueled my lifelong love affair with horror, exploitation, blaxploitation, low budget action, and pretty much anything that had to be turned off when my grandparents visited. I turned out okay for the most part, so how bad could all these films actually be?

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